right now, i'm having quite a challenging time trying to manage my time well, having to balance b/w my attachment, my studies (imagine having to study 5 months worth of lessons on my own as i'm doing Research & Development work which doesn't have anything much to do with all my final year subjects), tuitions, weekend classes, part-time teaching, housework, major project, Mentoring, Nur Ikhwan (particularly the Training & Development Unit i was given the amanah to be in-charge of), seminars & talks (i loike~), resting time, my relationship with Allah, Rasulullah s.a.w. & others.
and it doesn't help that the students i've to teach@ d As-Syafa'ah mosque are very hyperactive. approx 28 students each class (2 classes in total), ~80% are boys. age ranging from 10-14. the only gd thing i can think of at d moment is that it helps me to istighfar more... i really dunno how to handle those boys (the girls r polite, quite n attentive). it's not that they are rude, just that super NOISY. just tying to get them to settle down will take abt 10-15 mins. then when i'm talking or trying to explain smtg, surely there will be some clowns making funny remarks/ make jokes/ (either verbally or put on some kind of drama, with their pants pulled up high up till the chests or the shirts covering their head, hands inside, leaving the long sleeves of their madrasah uniform flapping around, etc.), or suddenly someone will scream or laugh so loud (ni time kecik tertelan microphone gaknye) ...n the list goes on and on...
so at the end of the 45 minutes of lessons, very little 'ilm are able to be shared. and there's not much time left till their exam. i'm extremely worried. have i performed my duty well as a teacher? am i being amanah? and as a senior Ustazah said during the asatizah meeting this morning (my 1st time attending a meeting there AND suddenly got to know i was to record the minutes!): "halal ke 100% duit yg kita semua dpt hasil dr kerja kita ni??" then what should i do oh Allah? to make things worse, i'm just the kind of person who can't keep on a straight face for long... even when i'm angry or annoyed, i can still smile or laugh. weird i know, but true. my students will then tease me n makin menjadi2 la their jokes sumer... -_-". i know it's my fault. is there any way to make your face more serious?
moving on, at the moment, i'm hooked on to Yahoo! Anwers. to be exact, the Religion & Spirituality category. very interesting questions asked by people across the world of different races, religions, countries, etc. Question like "Where is the proof that Islam is a peaceful religion?", etc.
i hope more Muslims will care to answer some of these questions, for if not, those from the other religions will take this chance to twist the facts to purposely shine a bad light upon Islam, which is already being misunderstood by many. Yesterday there was already one participant who e-mailed me thanking me for my answer (padahal bukanlah bagus mana pun my answer tu..) n telling me that he/she would like to know more about Islam. :)
ok. gotta stop now. have to get a goOd rest b4 another tiring week kicks off tmr... Assalamu'alaikum~ ;)
i understand sis.. it is difficult. but to address to your worry whether have you been carrying out your amanah, ask yourself have you tried your best? if you think you have, let Allah be the Judge. And of course, continue to improve yourself.
these things take time and practice, just like everything else. i believe, insyaAllah you will get better. i myself struggle sometimes in my class. i know its irritating and difficult isnt it :/
to help, let me give u a few pointers (tho i have to tell u i myself am still learning)
1st. u gotta make sure you are heard by the whole class. if they dont listen to ya, stand straight in front and say "Listen up!" firm and straight to the point. with kids, its no point sometimes trying to be soft and say "pls listen everybody..." insyaAllah this will work.
2nd. ask questions. aft you explain smtg, ask those who you think didnt listen to you. like, for eg: "amir, apa makna ...". if he doesnt know the answer, you can say "tadi tk dgr kan..."
3rd. use punishments. not the rabak kind la... just ask them to stand up. eg: "amir, kalau awak bising lagi, awak diri eh". this is almost to the... desperate measure. but insyaAllah it works esp if the kids are small.
sorry sis this is getting too long...
there are lots of other ways of course you can experiment and try. ask your senior collegues how they handle the kids. insyaAllah im sure they will be glad to help.
thats why i think, perhaps, its better to teach youths coz they dah paham sikit... i nvr try tho... its good isnt it if we experience these kind of things :)
all the best sis. and on top of everything, of course, doa from ALLAH. He, after all, is the best of all Helpers.